There are two vitally important aspects of communication - active listening and insightful responds given in a language the other person can hear.

Often when we have spent time developing our "spiel" we give answers that are automatic rather than individually appropriate.

For instance, a client of mine does what I shall term "healing" work in that she works with energy and inner wisdom to help her clients make choices that are more aligned with their true calling. Now, we know we can heal most anything by working from the inside out, but when you are in business you cannot announce that you have the answer to every problem - because people won't recognize their problem or that they need you.

Get a specific target audience

Choose the population you want to serve. Baby Boomers, people in transition from jobs - get very specific about what's going on in the lives of the people you want to work with. Only then can you begin to find the solutions to their problems and offer them an answer.

Speak their language

For instance, Boomers are faced with the fact that 75% of the population cannot afford to retire and their problems revolve around what they can do to bring in income. They also want to make a difference in their world. Those are the concerns I address in my "put your wisdom to work" coaching.

People in transition from jobs may be dealing with issues of self-confidence, or the need to learn new skills or just plain discouragement. Do you see how the difference in your target audience will affect the language you speak to them?

Drop the jargon

What do words like "serenity" and "inner peace" mean to you. Perhaps they are not as meaningful as "finding yourself relaxed and contented with every aspect of your life." Or "going to work every day knowing you are making a difference in the lives of others." Don't use shortcut words. Expand your phrasing to indicate what that will look like in their lives.

When you are speaking to someone, find the words that they can readily relate to, particularly the emotions. I prefer to reinforce positive emotions. Would you rather hear, "Wouldn't you like to be able to walk down stairs without pain" or "wouldn't you like to take you dog for long walks in the sunshine?" One is a reminder of the problem, the other is an image of the relief. The second one still addresses the problem of stiff joints, but focuses on what is possible for that person to experience.

You know the right words to say

When I begin to work with a new client we know we are looking for what I call a High Brand", that phrase that encapsulates what they do and instantaneously communicates it to others. I was the Vision Distiller. Now I'm Your Idea Optimizer. But the advice I give is always the same, just start explaining what you do to people in everyday language and your brand will show up - as will really great phrases for your landing pages.

Speak from the heart

When you sincerely want to share insights and information with another person they really "get" it. You will slow your speech down if you need to, choose vocabulary that fits the occasion, and simple "be" with the person as you exchange ideas. When you listen well and speak from your heart you will always speak their language.

©2009 Cara Lumen